Sunday, February 1, 2015

Club Going Up... on a Saturday Night

I remember when I used to write deep, poetic things about my real life. And somehow along the way I shied away from that, for fear of judgement let's be honest. However, today I was inspired. I want to have a go at it again.

Last night was my sisters 25th birthday. She lives with us here in Germany and she wanted to go out. 25 is a milestone you know. It's a quarter of a century! Anyway, we decided to go to a club called Crown.


We actually invited quite a few LDS people to join us, none of which could make it. The cool thing is though, that I think many of them would have come if it wasn't super last minute. I'm very thankful I'm living in a place with a few good women (and men).



For some reason though, there's an audience of LDS people I feel I need to justify my behavior to. I can't quite figure out why that is though. I feel like I need to confess my sins, or I worry they are going to think badly of me for going out on a Saturday night of all nights!

Because of the work I've done on myself, I realize this is non-progressive way of thinking and it stems from an internal belief about myself. However, if I'm being just regular, it eats at me.

So then I struggle with these thoughts of, well is going out bad? Or, do I go with, well it's so much fun! Truth is? There's no answer. It depends on who you are. For me, I am largely unaffected by worldly things such as clubs, r-rated movies, and swearing. There are people I know who are super duper sensitive to these things. And that's for them! I am grateful for a God who knows us so well individually.

Sitting in the fog filled room with blaring music and a large crowd of people who are not ethnically similar to me at all, is really fun. I LOVE people watching. I usually don't get to enjoy the sport as much when I go out because I'm too busy dancing the night away. However, with my condition, I was somewhat forced to sit back and watch. (I did dance one song!) I love people. I love their stories.I just love people. And I met SO many last night! There were the people from Hohenfels, and the ones that work at the PX and the Germans! I met three gay people last night, one of whom was dressed like a female (I have a picture with him. her?).  Chelsi, remember the one couple? The one with the schlumping?

I've got a lot of work to do to get back to who I was before...well, everything. And for me, it starts with experiences like this. And, if nothing else, being around severely inebriated people only confirms my desire to not to drink even more. :-)

Happy 25th Sis! Thanks for giving me this opportunity to enrich my life.

Also, not to make this about me but,  I sent this to my friend at the end of the night. So swollen!


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