Monday, April 7, 2014

Transition

There's transition in labor and there is transition in life. I would say they are comparable. Transition in labor is the most uncomfortable time. I mean, if I'm gonna go hypnobabies, I would never say the words that I would use normally like pain, and hurt and intensity and wanting to die. It's actually the worst part of birthing (in my opinion). It's the time between 8ish and 10 centimeters when I started to shake a little and I knew that the time to push was coming. But I wasn't there yet.

That's how I feel about life right now. I'm right on the brink of entering the next stage of labor. lol. Except it's real life. I want to die.

This happened to me the week before David left for China too. And the week or so before he left for LDAC. And all the other times he's left me for extended periods. lol.

I just wrote about these difficult times but that was last week. This is THIS week. I must say that it's been better. I went from hating David to loving and missing him and then today I'm back a little but to hating him. I'm ready for this to be over.

That's not to say that there hasn't been amazing people easing this burden a long the way. I've mentioned some of them. My neighbors, my friends and my mom and dad. I don't know what I would do without them. I'm feeling especially bad because all I do is complain to my mom (well, everyone) and I know it must seem like I'm ungrateful or sad about staying here with her. But that's not it at all. Being here has made it totally possible for me to NOT be crazy. She and my dad have kept us fed and happy and warm and that is the very foundation for Maslow's hierarchy of needs, the most important ones.

We are still 8 days away from leaving this continent. And it seems like all too much time and way too little. We are approximately 5 days from seeing David (if all goes well) and 2 days away from a birthday of our littlest one (who right now is making me want to pull my hair out strand by strand).

This is also the very beginning of a long journey short term and long term wise. Short term I'm thinking of a freaking ridiculously long trip there, and then once we get there, that whole thing.

I'm following a girl on Instagram whose husband is currently in Germany and also in his Cavalry unit. There may or may not be things happening on that end that cause me to rethink what I was thinking in the first place about this Army life. But as the nice officer said who pulled my mom and me over the other day, "You're just as much in it as he is." So true.

So stay tuned as we muddle and trudge and hopefully skip and hop through this journey in Germany.

Speaking of which, I've created a page specifically for all things Germany life Army stuff. haha. It's

Right Here

There isn't much there yet but hopefully there will be! Thanks for being supportive even if you're a secret stalker. :-)

 

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